Why Singleness Isn't a Problem to Be Fixed, But a Gift to Be Embraced

The Commonly Held Belief: Singleness Is a Problem

If you’ve been single for any length of time, you’ve probably heard some variation of this:

“When are you going to find someone?”
“Don’t worry, your time will come.”
“Have you tried [insert latest dating trend] yet?”

Society—and even the church—often treats singleness as a problem to be solved, a waiting room for something better. This mindset is so ingrained that even singles themselves start believing it. They view their current season as incomplete, less-than, or something to endure until they finally reach the “real goal” of marriage.

But what if this belief is not only wrong but harmful?

How This Belief Became So Prevalent

The idea that singleness is a problem to be fixed stems from both cultural and religious influences.

Cultural Expectations

From romantic comedies to social media, we’re inundated with messages that glorify relationships as the ultimate achievement. Happy couples are celebrated, while singles are often pitied.

• Example #1: The storyline of almost every movie concludes with the protagonist finding “the one.”
• Example #2: Holiday gatherings where family members ask when you’ll settle down, as if your value is tied to your relationship status.
• Example #3: Social media feeds filled with engagement announcements and wedding photos, creating a false narrative that everyone else has “made it.”

Misinterpretations in the Church

Even within Christian circles, singleness can be misunderstood. Well-meaning church members often focus on marriage and family as the ultimate expression of God’s design, sidelining the unique role and value of singles in His Kingdom.

This belief has led to widespread dissatisfaction, frustration, and even shame among singles who feel they’re not measuring up to an unspoken standard.

Why This Belief Is Flawed

Singleness isn’t a problem. It’s a gift.

The Bible tells us that singleness is a valuable and purposeful state of life. In 1 Corinthians 7:7, Paul writes, “I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.” Here, Paul calls singleness a gift—just as much as marriage is.

When we view singleness as a problem, we miss out on its blessings. Singles have unique opportunities for growth, ministry, and intimacy with Christ that are often harder to achieve in other life stages.

Real-Life Proof

• Personal Story: A single woman in our ministry shared how she found profound joy in mentoring young women in her church, something she wouldn’t have had time for in a different season of life.
• Biblical Example: Jesus Himself was single, demonstrating that our relationship status has no bearing on our ability to live a full and purposeful life.
• Statistical Insight: Studies show that singles who focus on personal growth and faith report higher levels of satisfaction than those who constantly seek a partner to fill a void.

By embracing singleness, you can experience freedom and God’s purpose like never before.

How to Shift Your Mindset

Step one: Stop seeing singleness as something to escape. Start seeing it as a season to embrace.

Actionable Tip: Write down three ways singleness has been a blessing in your life. Reflect on how this season has allowed you to grow closer to Christ, develop your talents, or impact others.

When you change your perspective, you’ll discover the peace and joy that comes from trusting God’s plan. You’ll no longer view singleness as a waiting room but as a mission field.

Why the "Old" View of Singleness Is Fading

The belief that singleness is a problem is slowly losing ground—and for good reason.

1.  Cultural Shifts: More people are recognizing the value of living purposefully in every life stage.

2.  Biblical Understanding: Movements like S.A.L.T. are helping singles see their worth and purpose through God’s lens.

3.  Practical Realities: Singles are realizing they don’t need a spouse to live a meaningful and fulfilling life. They are loving being single, saved and satisfied with the Savior, Jesus Christ.

The future isn’t about escaping singleness; it’s about embracing it. Imagine a community of Christian singles who thrive in their faith, purpose, and joy—no matter their relationship status. That’s the new narrative we’re building.

Conclusion

Singleness isn’t a problem to be fixed; it’s a gift to be embraced.

When you stop chasing the world’s approval and start trusting God’s purpose, you’ll find joy, freedom, and a deeper relationship with Christ.

So, take what you’ve learned today and apply it. Reflect on your blessings, pursue your purpose, and lean into the truth of God’s Word. Because singleness isn’t second best—it’s God’s best for you right now.